Football picks recap: Week 12

It came down to the Sunday night game to settle this week's score, and here it is without further ado. First, the losers:

LINO: He was poised to go into this week's tiebreak until the Ravens' Paul Kruger intercepted third-string Steelers QB Dennis Dixon in OT and kicked a 29-yard field goal to win it. Darn it all! But don't worry Lino... you weren't the only person who got hosed at the last minute this week.

LOU: It was arguably worse for him... he picked the Cardinals, but then had to watch the Titans win their fifth game in a row by scoring the winning touchdown as time expired. That'll depress you.

MAUREEN: Kind of a given that she's here, but would've gone 2-for-3 had the Falcons not scored their winning touchdown over the Bucs with 40 seconds left. So she still would've lost, but boy was there a lot of last-minute stuff going on this weekend.

That leaves Fr. Rob Keighron and Mark Hart, who both go 3-for-3 yet again and are headed for a tiebreaker to be announced by Lino on Thursday. Considering how well Fr. Rob's been doing with his football picks, he should be cleaning up in Vegas later this week.

Later, dudes.

We always liked October 14th, but we don't really know why

TCGS was not live on Thursday and Friday due to it being Thanksgiving. On Thursday they ran a best-of from October 14th. Not as creative as rebroadcasting the Rome Trip or Spring Break Broke, but we'll grudgingly take it.

Fast forward to Friday, and the best-of was from... October 14th. Are you kidding us? It's the same one from yesterday! We can vaguely understand giving us a best-of from six weeks ago, but the same episode twice in as many days?

And just in case you missed either rebroadcast, the Thursday and Friday shows are usually rebroadcast on Saturday and Sunday. So we're talking about half-a-dozen rebroadcasts of the same show in the span of four days. Can anyone out there spell l-a-z-y?!

Buy a t-shirt and help out a poor Catholic radio show host

You know you want one, don't you? Well, here's your chance to finally own the t-shirt of your dreams. Click here to buy one of the (in)famous Catholic Guy Show t-shirts in time for Christmas, and help Lino add to his benevolence fund! Pay only $9.99 and you too can receive interesting looks from passers by as you model the latest in Lino fashions. Operators are NOT standing by, so click on the link above and get to work!

Football picks recap: Week 11

Well folks, another week in the NFL is in the books, and so is another week of football picks by Lino & Company. And the end result? Another three-way tie. But first, our condolences go out to…

MAUREEN: The first contestant to lose today by picking against the undefeated Colts. Even if she had gotten that one right, she still would've been brought down by the Bengals' unexpected loss to the lowly Oakland Raiders. Coincidentally, that's the same game that also brought down…

LINO: Bummer about the Bengals, dude. Isn't this like the fifth week in a row that you've lost?

Now to the tiebreak contenders, who all were perfect this week…

FR. ROB KEIGHRON: Can this priest pick 'em or what? We haven't calculated it yet, but he certainly must have the best overall record of any of the contestants.

LOU: Refreshed from a week spent deciding the fate of others, he goes 3-for-3 but gets lucky with his Dallas and Detroit picks, which could've easily gone the other way. Yes, Fr. Rob had two close games as well, but he's been much more consistent. But that's no slam on Lou… a win is a win, and he's definitely been turning things around lately.

MARK HART: A no-brainer, a close one, and the inexplicable… that sums up the Bible Geek's 3-for-3 week. Granted, Lino and friends made his picks for him. And hopefully you all heard Lino's spiel about why he picked KC over the Steelers, since they both were in town for the National Catholic Youth Conference. Question is, did Lino even fathom that that pick might actually win? We certainly didn't. We can only guess that the Holy Spirit decided to hang around in KC after the conference concluded.

So there you go. With the show running a best-of on Thursday for Thanksgiving, our best guess is to tune in on Wednesday for Lino to dictate who wins the tiebreaker! If not, then expect Lino to declare this week null and void just like he did for Week 6 after he came back from Italy.

UPDATE 11/25: As expected, football was discussed on today's show, and Lino decreed Mark Hart the winner of Week 11's "tiebreaker" (whatever that means nowadays). Mark won thanks in no small part to Lino, who thought he'd get a laugh by picking the Chiefs on Mark's behalf, only to see his plan completely backfire. Gotta love it.

Snazzy, huh?

Check out the new Catholic Guy T-Shirts... shamelessly lifted from Lino's Facebook page:

Week 9 football picks recap

Gee. Another tiebreaker. Never would've predicted that in a million years. Now that we've been sufficiently underwhelmed by the outcome of this week's contest, let's recap it for you:

GOING TO TIEBREAKER: Lou and Fr. Rob. In case you missed last Thursday's fun, Lou got all of his picks in Week 7 right and was in a three-way tiebreak to determine the winner... that is until Lino wiped out Week 7's contest altogether and reminded us that sloth truly is a deadly sin. To make it worse, he did it with Lou in absentia, and he shushed Lou (and Mark Hart) on Wednesday's show when they started talking about how well they did. Okay Lino, we understand that you're sore about not having won the past few weeks, but no need to take it out on your assistant producer. Sheesh!

Anyway, thanks to a truly lousy spot that the Eagles got after a 4th and 1 quarterback sneak (resulting in a turnover that led to a Dallas touchdown), Lou will compete with perennial tiebreak contestant Fr. Rob Keighron on Thursday to determine a winner. So Lou gets another shot at greatness. How will it be decided? Only God knows... and Lino's even trying to keep that secret from him.

LOSER'S BRACKET INDUCTEES: Lino, Maureen & Mark Hart. This week you were either good or terrible, and these three fall into the latter category, each getting only 1 pick right. So get out your bibles, fire up Twitter, and cue the Beastie Boys... it's gonna be a fun week for these three.

"Okay, what kind of a sick doggy snuff film is this?!"

Easily the best part of yesterday's train wreck of a show was Lino finding out live on the air what really happened to Old Yeller at the end of the movie. Having listened to this, we can't help but offer you the following clip from the TV show Friends, where Phoebe makes the same unnerving discovery... only she's actually watching it:

Godliness is next to Laziness

Leave it to Lino to pull another fast one on us. On Thursday's show, Lino declares Week 7 of the picks contest a wash. Officially, the reasoning is that the picks were made a long time ago and that he doesn't want to dwell on the past. Unofficially, he's the laziest person we've ever laid ears on.

So here's the final verdict on Week 7:

• Lino and Maureen automatically lost because they each missed a pick. We'll grudgingly acknowledge that he did sing the Beastie Boys on the air to fulfill part of his punishment.
• The remaining three got all their picks right, but no winner is declared since Lino's a lazy bum. This is especially bad for Lou, since he had a decent chance of being Week 7's winner had there actually been a tiebreaker.

Way to throw your assistant producer under the bus while he's not around, Lino.

All cats go to purgatory

Welcome back, Lino! We're impressed that your return flight didn't explode in an enormous fireball as we had thought it would.

As our gift to you on your first day back on the air, we present to you Gus Lloyd's status update on Facebook from earlier today:

Today is All Souls Day. We pray for all the souls in Purgatory. We're not really sure what Purgatory is like, but I think it would have to include listening to Lino Rulli on a 24/7 loop. Now that's punishment!!

Isn't that just a knee-slapper? But to show that we at Lino Watch are Fair and Balanced™, we also present to you part of his status update from Friday (when he unexpectedly took the day off):

The devil works in funny ways, doesn't he? Last week my cat bit me, now it is infected and I'm on antibiotics.

That's right. Gus was standing at his window last week when his cat snuck up behind him and laid down. He accidentally stepped on his tail, and the cat repaid him the favor by sinking its fangs in Gus' leg.

And of course, the comment that ties it all together, made in response to today's status update and courtesy of Raymond:

You know this is going to come back and bite you in butt, right? Oh wait, didn't your cat already do that?